I have twenty minutes to write and it's twenty minutes I'm going to use to the best of my ability while both my laptop and iPod charge for this journey to the other side of Ireland, to wait for a plane to take off tomorrow, to take me back to the States, where I won't get back home until very late that same night. It's here, folks.

Like the before mentioned departure date from Port Huron, the departure date from Ireland has sort of snuck up on me. Not that I didn't know it was there, just that I've been busy doing other things to bother with it. But I can do that no longer.

So I leave. What happens when I get home?

I would hope my friends would have this date marked in their calendars with circles around it and arrows pointing to it as if to mark its significance; however, while I don't know the value in this long awaited return it's perhaps me who has been making the circles and drawing in the arrows because for forty-three days now I have been completely on my own aside from the very few times that I was with people I knew.

Over in Europe I had to find my way pretty much, forge ahead alone, and I got to admit- it was hard and sometimes painful to keep forcing myself forward. Would I have seen more with another person? Would I have experienced less?

Loneliness is an all too familiar feeling and it's documented in this blog. It is a motif in my life and it comes and goes in various forms. I am slobbering over the opportunity to really focus in on this subject, possibly in a future play I will write (it's definitely not going to be in the next few months, but I will leave it on the shelf and pick it up later).

I will go home. I will see the people I only got to see a few times in between college and this trip and I'm hoping for glorious things. And it doesn't need to be glorious as in magical to anybody else but me...a simple get together with a movie on discussing pop culture would be considered glorious to me at this point.

I only have a few weeks before I leave for college again, and then it's off for who knows how long. I want to be a holiday RA, meaning I'd spend a majority of my time in Chicago, added to the fact I want to be a summer RA I would be basically be living in Chicago year round from when I start school again until I graduate hopefully. This leaves a fine predicament for the friends back home.

Growing up you have to deal with things like this but up until now I haven't really. There have been a few friends, over the course of a long time, who have faded away and others who I haven't seen in years and have been able to keep really good contact with, but are my friends and I ready for this?

There's very little chance, noting the number of times this has happened, that they'll come and visit. Maybe once an academic year (if I'm lucky).

I want to stay in Chicago or go to LA or New York. They are back in Michigan and I'm unsure of their plans.

It's life happening in front of your eyes and if I had more time to type I'd keep doing it...but for a later date the conclusion will be written maybe